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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25494082">The Sleeper Express</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Haya_dono/pseuds/Haya_dono'>Haya_dono</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Uta no Prince-sama</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Dreamlike, F/M, Mentions of Suicide, Mystery, Romance, Suspense</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 03:34:27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>14,696</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25494082</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Haya_dono/pseuds/Haya_dono</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Based on the Shining Live event: Mystical Tour: Sleeper Express<br/>The Head Conductor (Masato) begins to tell a series of stories to a new guest who has trouble sleeping. However, the guest starts to realize things are not what they seem in the Sleeper Express.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Hijirikawa Masato/Original Female Character(s)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. I.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Thanks to polyphenols for beta-reading this fic!<br/>To enhance your experience, please listen to the suggested music indicated in the links as you read. Open them in a new tab with Ctrl +Left click. If possible, wear headphones to enjoy the most of it.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Dear guest, does sleep evade you tonight as well? It is no lullaby, but allow me to tell you a fascinating story.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>All aboard! Let us set off on the sleeper limited express, and begin an endless journey of dreams.</em>
</p>
<p> </p><hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <a href="https://youtu.be/SlcQWUn5DeI">[1]</a>
</p>
<p>“Welcome to our sleeper limited express train. We are delighted you have chosen to ride with us,” a young man in a gallant suit said with a clear and teasing voice. His blue eyes on his guest, he smiled pleasantly as he introduced the impressive machine on the platform with an elegant flick of his hand.</p>
<p>“Everything in your compartment is the height of class and luxury. Please enjoy the international cuisine from top-rated chefs in our dining car as well. Our staff shall see that your every need is tended to. We hope to make each guest feel at home during their long journey.”</p>
<p>The sounds of the nearby trains, the tumultuous bicker of other passengers, the hurried footsteps, they all seemed to be drowned out by the sound of his voice.</p>
<p>“I shall now inspect your ticket.” He said as he took the piece of paper from the guest’s hand. “Yes, everything appears to be in order. As head conductor, please allow me to personally guide you to your compartment.” The Head Conductor had an aura unlike any other, an affable personality as charming and mysterious as the depth of the sea, a brilliance like the moonlight shining on a starless night. Of course, his handsome features and elegant demeanor made him the perfect guide to the guests about to depart.</p>
<p>“Will this be all your luggage? Please watch your step as you board. When the steam whistle blows, our journey into dreamland shall begin.”</p>
<p> </p><hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z5nx8o6X1cw">[2]</a>
</p>
<p>The platform was as bustling as ever, making the Head Conductor chuckle. He would never be out of interesting stories, it seemed, yet he had to find the next customer as something else caught his eye.</p>
<p>In between the crowd, a young woman, with long soft lavender hair, looked around, almost surprised at the bustle, no, at the location itself. She seemed unaware she was carrying luggage of her own, to the point she jumped as she noticed her hand on the handle. But as soon as he had caught a glimpse of her, the sea of people hid her from view.</p>
<p>The Head Conductor shook his head, it was always a pity when he lost track of people who sparked his interest. But he couldn’t ponder much, as he had yet to find a new guest for their luxurious train or he wouldn’t be hearing the end of the Conductor’s remarks. He chuckled again.</p>
<p>So many guests to choose from, but all of them rushed in front of his keen eyes, as the sounds of the steam whistles signaled the imminent departure.</p>
<p>Suddenly, he felt someone bump into his back, and turned to see the same young woman from before. She stepped back scared, mumbling a quiet apology, looking even more confused and lost than before.</p>
<p>“Excuse me, Miss,” the Head Conductor said. “Are you perhaps looking for your train?”</p>
<p>The young woman shivered when she realized he had talked to her, glancing at the Head Conductor before nodding, letting him see her intriguing blue eyes.</p>
<p>“May I see your ticket? I will be able to help you locate your train.”</p>
<p>His eyes opened wide, as he read the imprinted letters of his Sleeper Express in the ticket she had held in her hand. This was a surprise to him, it wasn’t often that the guest had been summoned by chance, but he would not let this interesting turn of events go to waste.</p>
<p>“Oh, it seems you are a guest on our luxurious Sleeper Express. Allow me to guide you to a most pleasant ride with us, and I truly hope you enjoy your stay.”</p>
<p> </p><hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <a href="https://youtu.be/cVYH-7QGE-A">[3]</a>
</p>
<p>The young woman stepped into the Sleeper Express, holding a fragile expression and lonely air. Quiet and almost ethereal, she wore dark gloves covering her delicate hands and an antique, long sleeved dress which would have been fitting of a past era. Her long pale lavender hair left untied framed her glassy face and her mysterious, cloudy, blue eyes. One wouldn’t be surprised if they had mistaken her for a doll, as she hardly spoke anything on her arrival and preferred to look at the floor as the Head Conductor referred to her.</p>
<p>“This compartment shall serve as your personal quarters for the duration of the journey,” he said as he opened the door on the end of the car. “As the head conductor responsible for the operation of this train, I guarantee safety and comfort for all our guests.” As he would do with any other new passenger, the Head Conductor smiled at young woman, but, for the first time in his long time on this job, the guest didn’t return the gesture, choosing to nod so subtly that to the untrained eye, she would have seemed motionless.</p>
<p>Noticing the sudden stillness, a young blond man with sharp cold blue eyes betraying his affable demeanor and cladded in similar clothes to the Head Conductor walked in front of the guest. Clearing his throat to dissipate the mood, he said, “It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance. Together with the head conductor, I humbly serve each fine passenger aboard our train.”</p>
<p>The young woman barely reacted to his words either, though she avoided the Conductor’s gaze, preferring to focus on the floor. The Conductor didn’t seem to mind her, though.</p>
<p>“Cars 1 through 5 are designated guest quarters and dining is available between cars 2 and 3. Each has a restroom for your convenience,” the Conductor explained. “Dining car service will end at sunset, so please speak with the conductor on patrol should you wish for light, late-night refreshments.”</p>
<p>As he finished, both men noticed the young woman had dared to lift her eyes, though her right hand clenching her left proved she was still uneasy.</p>
<p>“If you please, dear guest,” the Head Conductor motioned her to enter the room, as the Conductor merely observed the situation.</p>
<p>The grip on her hand tightened, and the young woman hurried inside with a mumbled thank you as a reply. When she turned to close the door, she seemed surprised to see the Head Conductor walking behind her until she saw her luggage in his hands.</p>
<p>“You must be exhausted,” he replied with a smile. “I have brought your luggage inside, as I have mentioned before, the comfort of our guests is our utmost priority.  Now, if you’ll excuse me.” The Head Conductor stood by the door, bowing gracefully before leaving the room, closing the door behind.</p>
<p> </p><hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <a href="https://youtu.be/sCtixpIWBto">[4]</a>
</p>
<p>The young woman had been sitting on that lonely bench, for minutes or hours, she couldn’t tell how much time had passed. The sun had already set down, the sky colored dark blue without any source of light, as if the moon had run away as well. She couldn’t see anything past the dim light of the lamppost next to her, shadows dancing and scurrying behind her, in the corner of her eye, and disappearing when she turned.</p>
<p>The man she was waiting for was nowhere to be found, and with every passing eternity, something among the lurking shadows made her feel something like ice down her spine. Something deep in the blackness, staring at her, like a hidden blade about to strike.</p>
<p>He wasn’t here yet. She looked around again, hands against her chest, trying to ease her breath but the tremor in her hands wouldn’t disappear, a chill air against the nape of her neck, raising every hair of her body. She stood up quickly, unwilling to look behind her, and walked down the road back into the city, to hide herself among the people, to reach her house and secure herself behind a bolted door. But the lights on all the road disappeared as she walked near them, and soon she found herself stumbling amongst the darkness, walking wherever she thought an exit, some light would be.</p>
<p>She stopped for a moment.</p>
<p>Footsteps behind her.</p>
<p>Without thinking, she ran as fast as she could, many footsteps behind her galloping like a thunderstorm about to swallow and destroy everything in their wake. A faraway light, almost like a dream oasis, could be seen and she tried to reach it, but the more she ran, the further it grew. But she couldn’t stop, the impending storm on her back like a reaper’s scythe against her neck. She tried yelling for help, but her voice drowned in the darkness and the street was devoid of life. She wouldn’t stop, running and running as her lungs ached for breath, even if her legs were pierced by thousand tiny knives, she would make it to the light, she had no choice… Until everything in front of her turned into figures clad in darkness, moving too fast for her and blocking her only hope as she crashed into them and fell violently on the ground.</p>
<p>Her world was spinning, a cacophony of laughter and screaming filled her ears, both unintelligible and perfectly clear, and somehow she saw an object risen above her, the executor’s guillotine, as it fell and the hissing sound of death-</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <a href="https://youtu.be/_CUC2-S1NMI">[5]</a>
</p>
<p>Aria rose from her bed, cold sweat pouring down from her head. She looked at her surroundings, at first pitch black adding to her uneasiness, but then she could make out the silhouette of a bed and a small table, a single sofa, what seemed to be a luxurious room.</p>
<p>The limited Sleeper Express.</p>
<p>But even so, even if she knew it was a dream, Aria was terrified of the darkness lurking within. If she closed her eyes, she would still feel it against her skin. Stumbling between her luggage and the furniture, she made her way to the door and into the hallway, the lights of the car too blinding for a moment.</p>
<p>She gave thanks quietly for the light, breathing deeply to calm herself and bury her nightmares and memories, to no avail. The car was quiet, too quiet, and soon she couldn’t stop seeing hidden things in the little shadows of her surroundings. Going back to her room was out of question, her only choice was the door to the dining car, where someone could at least be there.</p>
<p>But the door’s handle wouldn’t budge, as if it was sealed with the heaviest metal. One hand, both hands, she tried pulling and pushing, wincing in pain, but her hands were too feeble, and the handle didn’t budge.</p>
<p>Aria moved away from the door, trying once more would end up in an injury. She couldn’t find a lock or chain, anything designed to prevent passengers from wandering during late hours. A drawn sigh escaped her lips. She didn’t want to go back to her room, but the hall was equally unnerving. She didn’t want to find anyone, yet she wanted to be next to someone so she wouldn’t feel so alone. She considered knocking on the door of room 1, but it seemed to be so late at night, what excuse would she give? She didn’t know anyone on the train, she hadn’t met any other passengers and she certainly couldn’t beg a stranger to let her inside their room just because she was scared.</p>
<p>The door to the dining car opened.</p>
<p>“I did not expect to find someone awake at this late hour, dear guest.”</p>
<p>She turned hastily to meet the Head Conductor, dropping her tense shoulders in relief, but her hands were still tightly clutching her chest.</p>
<p>“My apologies, it was not my intention to scare you. Did you wish for a late light refreshment?”</p>
<p>Aria shook her head. She opened her mouth for a moment, but she quickly shook away those thoughts and fell silent.</p>
<p>“Are you having trouble sleeping? It was just recently since you joined us, it could be so that you have not adjusted to the sleeper train.”</p>
<p>She didn’t reply, shrinking slightly as she looked down, but he took her silence as an affirmation.</p>
<p>“In that case, would you like to listen to a story? It is no lullaby, but it could help you fall asleep, dear guest.”</p>
<p>“A story…?”</p>
<p>The Head Conductor chuckled, she could feel his entertained gaze and <em>that</em> smirk of his, the same he had given her when he saw her ticket to the train.</p>
<p>“It is my duty to ensure the comfort of all of our guests, that would include you as well. If a story is what you need to fall asleep, I would gladly oblige. And it happens that I am fond of telling stories to passengers.”</p>
<p>“…Is that so…?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XkgyOZxIw0k">[6]</a>
</p>
<p> “For example, there was a guest long ago before you arrived who liked to stare at the windows deep in the night. For many nights I had happened upon him but whenever he was offered a late night refreshment, he declined it as did a similar young lady before me.” Aria looked away, but the Head Conductor merely smiled. “You see, he was on a long trip across the continent, so his figure on the hall became a common view for the Conductor and myself. Even the Conductor, whose work ethic is impeccable, grew tired of asking the guest every night if he needed anything.”</p>
<p>The Head Conductor stopped for a moment, waiting for Aria to ask him anything, but she merely returned his stare. However, the pained and terrified expression from before had faded, and she had stopped holding her hands.</p>
<p>“Eventually, he stopped me one day as I was doing my round checks. His face had been so dejected, our train had found itself in the middle of a heavy rain, with thunder and lightning as our orchestra, and I had thought to myself that perhaps he was the kind of man who was susceptible to the whims of the weather. Unsurprisingly, he asked me when the weather would clear up, as the clouds would not let him see <em>her</em>.</p>
<p>“I could not give him a proper reply, only that the weather did not seem to clear up at any point soon. And unfortunately, he would not be able to see her that night. By the way, dear guest, would you like to meet her?”</p>
<p>The young woman knitted her eyebrows, quickly scanning the car, but it was as empty as before, with only the Head Conductor and her. “There’s no one here…” She replied.</p>
<p>“Do you like to watch the stars, dear guest?”</p>
<p>“…I don’t know…”</p>
<p>She expected the Head Conductor to laugh at her, instead he smiled at her.</p>
<p>“I am afraid you will not be able to enjoy the moon. We are currently going through a long tunnel, and I believe you would rather not stare at the darkness instead. Perhaps another day you will be able to enjoy gazing at the stars.</p>
<p>“In any case, this guest would always wake up to see his beloved moon, without failure every single day. It was until that fateful storm, when the clouds had covered the entirety of the sky that he had failed to watch her. I would have not believed it to be so inconvenient, but when I least expected it, he fell to the floor, sobbing and mumbling thousands of apologies. To this day, I believe he had fallen in love with the moon and perhaps this journey was to move to a land where he could be with his beloved.”</p>
<p>The Head Conductor turned to Aria, expecting her to challenge his story. The thought of anyone falling in love with the moon was ludicrous, but instead, she looked at the curtain, at the moon supposedly waiting behind the curtain, past the long tunnel.</p>
<p>“…Could you please turn on the lights in my room?” Her voice had been barely audible, but the Head Conductor bowed pleasantly.</p>
<p>“As you wish.”</p>
<p>And within the blink of an eye, Aria saw her room illuminating and she couldn’t stop herself from sighing in relief.</p>
<p>“Are you afraid of the dark, dear guest?”</p>
<p>Aria jumped, the Head Conductor was suddenly next to her, wearing a knowing smirk that made her avoid his eyes. She thought to herself why he had to ask her that if he seemed to know the answer.</p>
<p> </p><hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <a href="https://youtu.be/t0A3zvqUZuw">[7]</a>
</p>
<p>Aria’s eyes opened, greeted by the dark ceiling above. She hadn’t dared move after the Head Conductor, teasing or not, had turned off the lights on her room. Her vivid nightmare temporarily forgotten after talking with him had slowly come back to her, though not strong enough for her to need the lights again. However, sleep refused to visit her as well. And so, she had tried to lull herself to sleep, to no avail. Figuring she wouldn’t be able to wander at night in the train, counting numbers until morning arrived was the only idea she could think of, hoping that the monotonous and boring chore could exhaust her as well.</p>
<p>She had reached 20,000 when she decided to stop, eyes closed or not, it had been the same. She was tired, but she couldn’t sleep. However, perhaps it was a good time to wander on the train, exercise would help her crash, and she couldn’t help being curious about the train itself. Her room hadn’t shown any passage of time, light failing to sweep in through the thick curtains on the single window. Still, the outside was more important to observe, and she was soon trying to open the door to the dining car again.</p>
<p>This time the door had moved, even if every inch of her arms down to her fingertips burned in a fiery tingling. Hands shaking and out of breath, she needed a moment to compose herself, only to find herself,</p>
<p>“Oh dear, were you perhaps looking for the Head Conductor or me?”</p>
<p>The Conductor came into view, a smile on his face that failed to reach her eyes. Aria unconsciously stepped back, but the Conductor paid her no mind as he stepped into the car.</p>
<p>“Madam, did you wish for a light late-refreshment?”</p>
<p>“What?”</p>
<p>The Conductor affably bowed, for a moment he seemed closer to a frigid butler, as he continued. “Perhaps it was the excitement of your trip, but it is already nighttime. As you can see, the other guests have retreated to their rooms.”</p>
<p>The empty hall and the empty looking diner car seemed to back up his statement, but Aria knew there was something off. However, she bit her tongue and nodded slowly.</p>
<p>“…I’ll go back to my room.”</p>
<p>Without asking, the Conductor followed her, opening the door before she could. And even if he had already closed the door and she thought she heard his footsteps out of the car, she couldn’t shake the feeling of his cold blue eyes looking through her. She would later inspect her room, but for that moment, Aria imagined it was most prudent to try to fall asleep.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Music:<br/><b>[1] Prelude in G Minor Op. 23 No 5. - Rachmaninoff </b>Link: https://youtu.be/SlcQWUn5DeI<br/>Rachmaninoff is considered one of the best composers and pianists of his time, however, there was a time when he decided he wouldn't compose anymore. He even fell into a deep depression afer a disastrous concert, but he eventually managed to overcome this with the help of his psychologist and could recover his passion in music and life again.<br/><b>[2] The Second Waltz – Shostakovich </b>Link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z5nx8o6X1cw<br/>Shostakovich lived in the Soviet Union, where music was obviously monitored and censored. As a result, his music is a polar opposite, on the surface, it is loud, and exaggerated in line with what the party deemed acceptable, but he also hid subtle irony and suberversion to show his true feelings.<br/><b>[3] Arabesque No. 1 - Debussy </b>Link: https://youtu.be/cVYH-7QGE-A<br/>Debussy is considered the turning point from classical music to impressionism. He avoided the structures used in the 18th and 19th century,  made use of different scales and progressions, which was revolutionary for his period. However, he hated being labeled an Impressionist, thinking it was suited to the visual arts. Nevertheless, he is one of the pillars of the musical Impressionism movement, along Ravel.<br/><b>[4] Prelude in C Sharp Minor Op. 3 No. 2 - Rachmaninoff </b>Link: https://youtu.be/sCtixpIWBto<br/>Rachmaninoff wrote this piece after a dream where he was at a funeral, and in the funeral there was a coffin. The increased tempo is meant to show his walking towards the coffin, and when he opened it, he found himself inside it. Because it became so popular with the public, the audiences always demanded it as an encore, and eventualy he grew to hate it. He felt that it wasn't a bad piece, but he had written much better pieces which didn't become as widespread as this one.<br/><b>[5] Rêverie - Debussy </b>Link: https://youtu.be/_CUC2-S1NMI<br/>Debussy wrote this in the early stages of his career, but it was one of the pieces that became popular. However, like Rachmaninoff's previous melody, he disliked Rêverie as he considered it a lacking melody. It makes sense, as he had later developed his style and this was one of his first piano solo pieces.<br/><b>[6] Clair de Lune - Debussy </b>Link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XkgyOZxIw0k<br/>Another popular melody from Debussy, it's actually the third movement of his Suite bergamesque. The titles of the third and fourth movement come from a poem by Paul Verlaine.<br/><b>[7] Moment Musicaux No. 3 - Schubert </b>Link: https://youtu.be/t0A3zvqUZuw<br/>The Six Moments Musicaux are some of Schubert's most played compositions. Even if he died at the age of 31, he was a highly prolific, yet unrecognized composer. He was known to be a workaholic, which is why he could write so much in such a short life. He was also Beethoven's biggest fan.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. II.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thanks to polyphenols for beta-reading this fic!<br/>To enhance your experience, please listen to the suggested music indicated in the links as you read. Open them in a new tab with Ctrl +Left click. If possible, wear headphones to enjoy the most of it.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>
<a href="https://youtu.be/g7C2it9cCsY">[1]</a>
</p>
<p>The same darkness, cold sweat down her face, and the emptiness of her room. Aria sat on her bed, rubbing her eyes as she huffed. No matter what, she couldn’t sleep. She had tried twice at the very least, but neither had been for long and she was tired of lying on the bed. However, she was sure she had waited long enough for it to be day already. She counted in between dreams, a way for her to avoid her feelings and fears as she waited in the dark.</p>
<p>Opening the door to diner car was slightly easier, if she ignored the now common tingling sensation in her fingers safe in her gloves, and she walked carefully into the car. Her steps were muffled by the long rug under her feet, though being cautious was meaningless for she was the only person inside. However, that wasn’t what caught her attention.</p>
<p>Elegant chandeliers above her shone brightly, yellow light warming up the entire car, giving it the atmosphere of a classical party for the wealthy. In fact, they were the only source of light, for the several windows in the car were devoid of any color. Aria leaned closer to the nearest window by her, but outside she could only make out the dark silhouettes of the landscapes in a starless, moonless night.</p>
<p>“Dear guest, is there something you wished for at this late hour?”</p>
<p>Aria’s heart jumped as she turned to see the Head Conductor next to her. For a moment, she feared he was going to scold her, that she had seen something she shouldn’t. But instead, he had that smirk of his and a glint in his eyes, as if he was more amused at the spectacle of hers.</p>
<p>“S-sorry… I thought it was breakfast…”</p>
<p>“Breakfast? It is already past dinner time.”</p>
<p>Aria stared at the Head Conductor, but the look in his eyes made it clear that he wasn’t joking.</p>
<p>“It might be that you are finding it difficult to get used to the Sleeper Express. Such changes can warp your perception of time. For example, I can get terribly confused in the time and day. If you want a more accurate assessment, you will have to ask the Conductor instead. He is quite diligent and precise.”</p>
<p>“…He told me the same thing yesterday.”</p>
<p>“Oh, so this is your second time… It will be a matter of time until your body has adjusted to our train, if you need anything, from a different bedding to your pillow being adjusted, please let me know. It is my duty to ensure your comfort.”</p>
<p>“I just can’t sleep.”</p>
<p>The Head Conductor shook his head, as a large frown appeared on his face. “That will not do, it is important to get quality of sleep, even… no, especially on a luxurious trip. Perhaps another story will help you fall asleep.”</p>
<p>“…I guess…” She replied, except her words were drowned by the loud rumble of her stomach, and she felt her cheeks grew red. She hadn’t eaten since she had arrived, so it was normal for her to be hungry, but to be so loud in front of the Head Conductor…</p>
<p>“Hehe, I am sure the excitement has worn you down, but please take more care of your health.” There was a glint on the Head Conductor’s eyes, he wasn’t making any efforts to hide his amusement and she felt her face grow redder. However, he paid no mind to her as he continued, “I will bring you something, please excuse me.”</p>
<p> </p><hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <a href="https://youtu.be/L42sbnQxEmw">[2]</a>
</p>
<p>The Head Conductor placed two dishes on the table, snapping the young woman out of her trance as she looked out at the window, probably trying to understand her situation. Even if she had been confused at the flow of time in the Sleeper Express, she seemed to be holding herself enough to be aware of the peculiarities of her ride, although she didn’t voice them. He smiled to himself; their meeting was certainly fortuitous, yet he wouldn’t have asked for a most intriguing guest.</p>
<p>What intrigued him wasn’t limited to her rising suspicion amidst chaos, it was also her surprising naiveté as she eyed the chocolatines he had placed for both of them. They were bread similar to a sweet roll, rectangular and filled with exquisite chocolate. He was rather fond of them, but it was as if she had never seen them in her life. Of course, that wouldn’t do.</p>
<p>“Have you never had <em>pain</em> <em>au</em> <em>chocolat</em>, dear guest?” He smiled as she kept inspecting the bread on her plate. “I believe in other parts of the world it is called chocolatine or chocolate bread.”</p>
<p>The young woman didn’t answer his question, eyes fixed on the piece of bread. Unconsciously, her hand reached to remove one of her gloves, but she immediately froze, clearly battling with herself on what to do, seemingly having done something forbidden or unacceptable for her. It hadn’t escaped his inquisitive gaze either, but he knew it wasn’t the time to ask it, yet.</p>
<p>“If you are worried about your gloves, you can later ask the Conductor or myself to have them washed. But, I am quite sure the laundry inside this Sleeper Express is not something of your interest, and you are more intrigued about the taste of this magnificent bread. Have you ever baked bread?”</p>
<p>The young woman shifted in her seat, looking meekly at his eyes, as if trying to figure out the meaning behind his expression. There was something endearing in that, innocent yet sagacious and perceptive. He found himself liking her more the more they talked.</p>
<p>“This bread in particular uses layered dough which is similar to a puff pastry. If you were to open it, you would be able to see the layers. When it is prepared, the dough is folded-“</p>
<p>The sound of her stomach interrupted him, and her cheeks flushed a brilliant crimson, shutting her eyes, perhaps praying for the earth to swallow her again.</p>
<p>“Hehe, you can indulge in our midnight snack, dear guest,” he whispered with a gleeful grin, almost bordering on teasing. “Perhaps… If you promise me not to tell this to the Conductor, I might gift you with another of our delicate pastries.”</p>
<p>He wouldn’t stop looking at her, softening his gaze as she tried to not wolf down her chocolatine to satiate her hunger even if she seemed shy to eat in front of others, nor when she seemed oddly interested in his talk about bread.</p>
<p>The young woman was truly an interesting guest.</p>
<p> </p><hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n_yIgrkSNzE">[3]</a>
</p>
<p>“Perhaps you heard a faint harmony that enchanted your sleep, dear guest.” The Head Conductor’s footsteps filled the silence embracing the young woman. “Shall I tell you another story to help you sleep?”</p>
<p>“…You always do as you please…” The Head Conductor couldn’t tell if she was shy or cold, but his pleasant smile never faded.</p>
<p>“Hehe, but you always seem eager to listen to them, my dear guest.” He turned to the window in front of them. The light taps of the rain, muffled by the swaying of the train, finally became audible, a melody to accompany his story.</p>
<p>“I once talked to a young man, long ago, long before you went on this journey. He had once worked as a sailor at a port in a southern country surrounded by water. Have you ever been to the sea?”</p>
<p>She shook her head.</p>
<p>“Dear me, perhaps you should make a detour on your journey to feel the warm salty breeze. You would find this experience like nothing else you have seen.” He received a stoic stare as reply, but he brushed it as always.</p>
<p>“This young man was rather attractive, perhaps he had captured the hearts of several maidens, with tanned skin and wide, strong shoulders as a result of his work at the sea. But just as one maiden standing at the beach can only see the sea in its beauty, sailors and fishermen have known its other side, the fierce and dangerous darkness that lurks between the quiet shore, when one has gone to sleep and the moon should be reflected on the waters, light fading in their depths.”</p>
<p>The raindrops didn’t stop, and the Head Conductor walked closer to the nearest window, the young woman following him without a word.</p>
<p>“He said that these raindrops were the sounds of an invitation, one he had obtained long ago on a sleepless night on his cabin. While he had listened for a long time, he had made no attempts at answering this call, even if the harmony became more alluring with every passing night. One day, the murmur of an enchanting melody told him to accept a ring she would give him, for he would become the king of the lake should he betrothed her.</p>
<p>“But he could not accept it. You see, the young man had his beloved, waiting for him at the end of this journey to join their lives. So this alluring visitor, enraged at his rejection laughed at him, vanishing in a violent shower that hammered the windows of the ship.”</p>
<p>“…Ondine wouldn’t have been happy,” the young woman quietly replied, the Head Conductor smiled as the lights on the car flickered.</p>
<p>“Oh, perhaps you have met her?” He asked in a soft, alluring murmur, accompanied by the faint drops outside.</p>
<p>“I’m feeling sleepy, please excuse me,” the young woman answered with a small bow and headed to her room without looking back, his smile always following her as she disappeared from his sight.</p>
<p> </p><hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <a href="https://youtu.be/wXmL55DwuaQ">[4]</a>
</p>
<p><em>“…It’s night,</em> <em>again</em>.<em>”</em></p>
<p>Aria looked at the lone window in her room, hidden behind the elegant curtain, seemingly blocking all light from outside, or not. The view was similar to the one she had seen before the Head Conductor found her at the dining car, a dark horizon fading into the night sky, where she could barely make out the silhouettes of the forests and mountains beyond. It was hard to tell with no lights on, she couldn’t let it be known she was awake, but it seemed there was no way to open the window from the inside, fused to the train itself.</p>
<p>One thing less to investigate, she wandered to the hall of her car, empty as it had always been for her. She knelt down to the floor trying to peek beyond the door, but she could only see no signs of lights on inside. She couldn’t tell if the room was empty or not, so she stood up with difficulty and pressed her ear against the door. Nothing to hear. No longer willing to miss the opportunity, she knocked on the door next to her room, having already prepared some excuse in case she met someone, but she was greeted only by silence.</p>
<p>The other doors yielded similar results, with her knocking failing to reach anyone or betray the existence of someone behind the door. But instead of giving up quietly, she rushed to open the door to the next car as fast as she could, ignoring the pain in her hands. Her fingers tingled as she ran across the dining room, noting the equally empty seats and tables, except for a large object hidden under a blanket. However, she had no time to inspect the dining car. Confident that not wearing her shoes wouldn’t give her away as fast to the conductors, she made it to the third car, one she had never reached before.</p>
<p>As she stepped in, she expected to find any of the conductors, but she found herself in a similar looking car, as equally deserted as hers. Knocking on any door yielded the same results, though she could hear some faint snoring behind the door at the end. However, the person inside ignored her louder knocking and she couldn’t keep trying.</p>
<p>Opening a third door in a row, she needed several minutes to catch her breath and let her aching hands rest for a moment, constantly looking behind her shoulder. She was certain that by this point the Head Conductor should be close; he had a penchant of coming from behind her, and his absence made her ironically more anxious. But she had made it this far, and she stubbornly struggled to open the door leading to the second car, bracing herself to be found.</p>
<p>Or not.</p>
<p>The hall was as empty as the others, devoid of any sign of life. And so she walked to the door closest to her, ignoring the pain in her hand, to once more knock on it and-</p>
<p>“Dear guest, if you cannot sleep, would you join me in a secret midnight tea party? I shall prepare us some sweet, hot milk.”</p>
<p>Aria’s hair on her neck stood up, heart sinking as she turned to meet the smiling Conductor’s face right in front of the same door she had come from moments before. He bowed gently, but that action made ice go down her back and she could swear there was a dangerous glint in his eyes.</p>
<p>“I had a nightmare…” she replied, trying her best to control her voice, with every passing second feeling that she should not be there, but the Conductor said nothing of the sort.</p>
<p>“Dear me, this will not do. The Head Conductor will be worried to hear you are still affected by them. Again, allow me to offer you some sweet, hot milk. I have no stories to offer you, but milk works wonders in lulling one to sleep.”</p>
<p>“<em>You both certainly want me asleep</em>,” she thought to herself. <em>“In this weird train where day never comes.” </em>However, she knew she couldn’t say anything and she wasn’t in the easiest option to refuse him.</p>
<p>“Please take hold of my hand. It would be most unfortunate if you were to fall by some chance and injure your lovely self,” the Conductor said as he offered his hand to her, but Aria unconsciously stepped back.</p>
<p>Holding her hands close, she quickly muttered, “I-I am fine…” Then winced, scolding herself for not keeping it under control.</p>
<p>“Oh, I apologize. I had not considered holding hands would make a lady as yourself so distressed. That is charming in a way.”</p>
<p>Thinking it better that the Conductor thought of her as shy about physical contact, Aria followed him all the way back to the diner car. From the corner of her eye, she noticed again the large hidden object but she preferred not to ask anything yet.</p>
<p>Unlike the Head Conductor, the Conductor seemed a man of few words. Certainly, he was helpful and cordial when he talked to her, but during their supposed tea party, he made no attempts at conversation. As she sipped the milk in her cup, she couldn’t help noticing how detached he was in reality, unlike the Head Conductor who constantly talked as they ate whatever he brought. This gesture was mere courtesy, but perhaps she could get answers.</p>
<p>“Where are we right now?” she dared to ask, after both were finished with her drinks.</p>
<p>“Our present location? We just now passed through a tunnel and by a large lake.”</p>
<p>“I-I’m not good with landscapes… What’s the name of this place?”</p>
<p>“You wish to know the name of an actual station?”</p>
<p>She nodded.</p>
<p>“If a name will give you clarity, I am happy to oblige. However, in your current state, even if I tell you, I doubt you will remember. This sleeper limited express train is fueled by our guests’ memories. Even my own memories of the past were wiped clean long ago.”</p>
<p>“Wh-” She blinked fast, eyes wide open.</p>
<p>“Oh, did you believe me just now? My apologies. Teasing guests who are half asleep is the only source of amusement for one as busy as I.”</p>
<p>“..T-that wasn’t funny…” She hushed, with a deep frown on her face. Her reaction earned a chuckle from him, but instead of making her feel relieved, she felt as if spiders crawled over her skin.</p>
<p>“Now then, dear guest, it would be most prudent to go back to sleep,” he said gently, but his actions urged her to move. Still shocked from his words, she fumbled her way and followed him back to her room, to quietly lie in her bed. She closed her eyes as she felt his eyes on her, breathing deeply to relax and ease the creeping anxiety.</p>
<p>
  <em>“Now please close your eyes and drift off to sleep. As you are embraced by this never-ending train, may your dreams be pleasant until you finally fade away.”</em>
</p>
<p> </p><hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <a href="https://youtu.be/ALqOKq0M6ho">[5]</a>
</p>
<p>The Head Conductor entered the dining car, finding once more the young woman from before. He chuckled to himself, it would become a habit at this point. She was sitting at the same table as last time, keeping herself busy looking at the darkened horizon in front of her through the window.</p>
<p>“Are you having trouble sleeping, dear guest?” His simple greeting seemed to get her out of her musings, dazed to be interrupted by him but at the same time, with a faint understanding glint in her eyes, as if she expected him to do that.</p>
<p>Well, he wasn’t going to contradict her.</p>
<p>She stared at him before replying, trying to find something in his gaze, just as he was intrigued by her deeply broken eyes.</p>
<p> “Is it really night?”</p>
<p>He let out a laugh, as he saw her eyebrows furrow in confusion. There was something about that expression of hers that he couldn’t contain himself. “Would you like to know how many times you have asked?”</p>
<p>She sat quietly, but her eyes told another story as he could see many emotions in them, beautifully changing as she blinked fast, trying to comprehend what he had said. There was something interesting about humans when met with something beyond their understanding; he had been sometimes asked the same question in the past and it seemed to be taken as a joke. Her quiet reaction was a different one, charming as well.</p>
<p>After all, time had lost its meaning on the Sleeper Express.</p>
<p> </p><hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <a href="https://youtu.be/_JX-EIVTB2Y">[6]</a>
</p>
<p>Unsurprisingly, the windows behind the curtains of the car had the same view as her room. A seemingly eternal nightscape lay in front of her, a darkness she never seemed to be able to escape.</p>
<p>“Are you afraid of the dark, dear guest?”</p>
<p>“My name is Aria…” She blurted out, looking as surprised as the Head Conductor seemed amused at her reply.</p>
<p>“Are you afraid of the dark, Aria?”</p>
<p>She looked away.</p>
<p>“Hehe, there are many things lurking in the shadows, that is true. The dark is the perfect place to hide. However, even more terrifying things can hide on plain sight.”</p>
<p>“Does that apply to you?”</p>
<p>The Head Conductor let out a hearty laugh, looking at her with an enchanted gaze. “Do you think that of me?”</p>
<p>“You like to talk in riddles.”</p>
<p>He chuckled. “Does my way of speech sound like a riddle to you? Hehe, it is the first time I have been told that. I will take it as a compliment.”</p>
<p>“You are always telling me stories.”</p>
<p>“And you are always listening to them. But, to ease your worries, I simply find human lives fascinating. The stories they can tell are an extra reward in my job, and of course they help lull guests like you to sleep if they need to. Although, I must confess I enjoy telling them to some guests as well, so it is a pleasant cherry on top. But back to my earlier question, it seems you do not enjoy the darkness in your room, or am I mistaken?”</p>
<p>She couldn’t deny that.</p>
<p>“Please let the Conductor or me know if you need anything to help your stay be more comfortable. Your well-being is our top priority. Should you need faint lighting or-”</p>
<p>“Where exactly are we?”</p>
<p>The Head Conductor’s eyebrows raised slightly, but instead of a frown, he grinned at her. “That was an unexpected request. However, I am afraid I cannot help you. As ironic as this might seem, even if I am the Head Conductor, I am often confused with time and our locations. That does not mean that I am unaware of where I am, simply that I have yet to attach names to the locations we visit, even though I can easily recognize their views on sight. It is usually the Conductor who handles the specifics of that.</p>
<p>“Unlike a ship in the sea, our Sleeper Express’s route is determined by the tracks which guide us. That alone helps our line at work. Not to mention, it makes it easier for me to enjoy time with you, wouldn’t you agree?”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p><b>[1] Etude Op. 25 No. 5 Wrong Note - Chopin </b>Link: https://youtu.be/g7C2it9cCsY<br/>Chopin is one of the greatest pianists and he shows it in his works in the Études. Études are pieces meant to practice a specific piano skill and not considered a melodic piece itself. However, Chopin was able to infuse in his études a meaning and melody that wasn't found in the art before. He made two étude lists and this set was dedicated to Liszt's mistress because. The first set was dedicated to Liszt though. Chopin and Liszt had actually a complex friendship, full with jealousy yet respect for each other.<br/><b>[2] Un sospiro - Liszt </b>Link: https://youtu.be/L42sbnQxEmw<br/>Un sospiro is the third of the Three Concert Études Liszt wrote. As Chopin's, the études were meant to practice skills but Liszt himself was an odd ball, a piano virtuoso, he was one fo the two muscians considered to have sold their soul to the devil for their virtuosity, the other was violinist Paganini. So he clearly didn't struggle with the complexity of his compositions. He also had a flair for showing off at his recitals, and he was basically a rock star, full with crazy fans, and affairs with many women.<br/><b>[3] Gaspard de la nuit I. Ondine - Ravel </b>Link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n_yIgrkSNzE<br/>Ravel wrote Gaspard de la nuit, a series of 3 movement pieces to go along the imaginery of Aloysius Bertand's poems by the same name. The poem goes along the story, albeit slightly modified, that Masato told Aria in the fic. Each movement is of a high degree of difficulty, Ravel mentioned that it had to be that way because the devil himself had written those poems, so he had to keep the theme.<br/><b>[4] Little Red Riding Hood – Rachmaninoff </b>Link: https://youtu.be/wXmL55DwuaQ<br/>This is another piece part of a set of études, by Rachmaninoff this time. As the name suggest, the melody is meant to represent the Wolf as he swallows Little Red Riding Hood. Rachnaninoff had large hands, which helped him play the piano.<br/><b>[5] Hungarian Rhapsody No. 2 - Liszt </b>Link: https://youtu.be/ALqOKq0M6ho<br/>That Tom and Jerry/Bugs Bunny cartoon song depending what you watched first. It is the most famous of Liszt's 19 Hungarian Rhaposides he wrote as he rediscovered his roots from his Hungarian heritage and tried to represent what he thought was Hungarian folk music. The introduction theme here is actually based from Romanian music, which was what was written for the Hungarian upper class when he listened to it. In any case, it is infamous for its difficulty, though we're talking about Liszt.<br/><b>[6] Waltz in B minor Op. 69 No. 2 – Chopin </b>Link: https://youtu.be/_JX-EIVTB2Y<br/>Chopin, unlike Liszt, was a very shy and sickly person, and he seemed to envied Liszt's stamina and ability as a performer. He was actually very sensitive to critique, and he often suffered from stage fright. Unike Liszt, he kept a lot of compositions to himself, including this Waltz, and he hoped his pieces were burnt when he passed away. However, a friend of his didn't follow Chopin's wishes and saved all his manuscripts. Chopin himself was envied by Liszt, as Chopin had a way to express subtlety and melody in his compositions, oppossed to Liszt's flashy and strong music. However, as their friendship went over, both influenced each other in one way or another.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. III.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thanks to polyphenols for beta-reading this fic!<br/>To enhance your experience, please listen to the suggested music indicated in the links as you read. Open them in a new tab with Ctrl +Left click. If possible, wear headphones to enjoy the most of it.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <a href="https://youtu.be/p29JUpsOSTE">[1]</a>
</p>
<p>The Head Conductor’s gaze was fixed on Aria as she quietly examined the pastry for that night. Whether it was the unusual color or the elegant shape, the lavender rose tart seemed to have gotten her interest, or it had become a way for her to hide her bashfulness from him, even if it wasn’t successful.</p>
<p>He picked up his teacup, nonchalantly enough to be perceived as teasing, as he mentioned, “I have noticed you have slender and delicate hands.”</p>
<p>Aria froze in place.</p>
<p>“There is no need for you to take your gloves off. However, I believe you might have been complimented about your hands, they are those fitting of a pianist.”</p>
<p>She shifted uncomfortably in her seat, her eyes still fixed on the pastry but with a different urgency she couldn’t express.</p>
<p>“I-I, n-no, no one has told me that before,” she mumbled.</p>
<p>“Is that so? That is unfortunate, I believe you have beautiful hands, even if they are hidden by your gloves. Are you interested in music?”</p>
<p>“Music…? I-It’s fine, I guess…”</p>
<p>“Hehe, you gave off the impression of a connoisseur, not everyone is aware of the stories behind some pieces. But perhaps I was mistaken and you had heard of the stories but not their musical connection. After all, you are very interested in stories, as you keep indulging in mine.”</p>
<p>He ended with a teasing smile, but she didn’t meet his eyes. Aria’s lips were pressed tightly, as she stayed quiet.</p>
<p>“Of course, just having hands fit to play an instrument does not equate to one playing it. It was a mere observation. Though, I beg your pardon from my rude remark, even if it was meant to be a compliment.”</p>
<p>“…It’s okay…”</p>
<p>She was clearly not.</p>
<p>“In any case, you seem interested in the pastry I brought you this time. Because of the nature of our Sleeper Express, it is hard for us to grow and keep flowers inside, no matter how beautiful they are. Imitations are also unacceptable, so the only way we can have them is through these pastries. Were you aware that flowers hold different meanings?”</p>
<p>“I-I think I heard some of that before…”</p>
<p>“It is an amusing way of communication. When words fail, feelings can be conveyed through flowers. However, it is not only the flower itself, but its color is important to an adequate meaning. For example, the camellia is used to express love, or admiration. But one should only be giving a pink camellia to someone who is longed for, whereas a white one is better suited to conveying admiration to someone well-liked. Naturally, red ones represent love and desire, but you can realize the subtleties between these colors.”</p>
<p>“…I guess you want me to ask about the meaning of this rose?”</p>
<p>“Hehe, perhaps…” The Head Conductor grinned at her as his eyes glinted. “But I believe this would be an even more interesting story to tell later, wouldn’t you agree? Or perhaps, there are some things best left unsaid.”</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <a href="https://youtu.be/sbTVZMJ9Z2I">[2]</a>
</p>
<p>The Head Conductor entered the dining car and recognized the figure of the young woman, Aria, sitting by one of the windows, eyes fixed on the dark landscapes. Something else seemed to be hidden in her features; she still held her mysterious charm, but she had an expression akin to clarity. It wasn’t her ability to sleep, naturally, but she seemed to be at ease in the Sleeper Express.</p>
<p>He was relieved; a passenger so anxious to be in the train would be troublesome, especially after her trip to the second car.  However, with Aria sitting quietly by the window, even if she was awake, it seemed as if the worries of the Conductor were unfounded.</p>
<p>“Are you having trouble sleeping, dear guest?”</p>
<p>Aria turned to look at him. Her eyes, even if still troubled with turbulent emotions, also held a quiet calm understanding. She had found an answer to a question she had been asking herself, or perhaps she had forgotten the question altogether. It could be the effect of the Sleeper Express as she had become its passenger. For once, the Head Conductor didn’t want to think about the end of her stay, but he was glad if she could find some solace to what was troubling her.</p>
<p>“…I can’t sleep.”</p>
<p>He chuckled, some things were still the same. “Perhaps a small pastry can be of help. I do recall you quite loving the rose tart.”</p>
<p>Aria pouted briefly, avoiding his gaze, she could be endearingly bashful too.</p>
<p>“Hehe, if you don’t mind, perhaps we could enjoy some time off to leisurely gaze out the window. A change in routine helps one enjoy a story as well.”</p>
<p>It wasn’t long before he brought two lavender St. Honoré cakes, matching the color of her hair. She looked at the pastries, once again they were foreign to her but that didn’t stop her from meekly eating hers.</p>
<p>“Do you tell stories to other passengers?” she suddenly asked.</p>
<p>“Oh?” The Head Conductor lifted his eyes from his cup, a sly smile on his face. “Are you by any chance jealous of me sharing my stories with others?”</p>
<p>“Not really,” she replied, paying unusual attention to her cake. “I’m just wondering.”</p>
<p>“Hehe, I do enjoy telling stories to guests who cannot sleep. Don’t you find people fascinating? Every life is different, no matter how small it might seem. I am quite drawn to these stories and in turn I amuse myself sharing them with peculiar, I mean, curious guests.”</p>
<p>“I get the impression you are mocking me.”</p>
<p>“On the contrary, I find it quite stimulating to share stories with you. You are certainly quite fond of them, and a keen listener is just as important as a good storyteller. For example, even if you are quite discreet in your reactions, your comments and observations are surprisingly on-point and cultured. It is not the quantity of comments that matters, but the quality as well. On the other hand, the Conductor doesn’t share your interest in my stories and swiftly rebukes any attempt of mine to share any new discovery.</p>
<p>“And of course, there are guests who are quite vocal and talkative. Some are rather enthusiastic about the stories, though they give off the impression that the finer details haven’t been understood, no matter how invested they were in the story. Even if they are tales to pass the time, understanding the hidden details enriches even the simplest story. Not to mention, finding someone who shares the knowledge and insight needed would be as common as a blue moon, so one should treasure them even further, wouldn’t you agree?”</p>
<p>When he turned, he found Aria, head leaning against the glass, fast asleep. “Really,” he whispered in an affectionate chiding tone, more to himself than to her, “and here I was expecting to see you flustering.” Eyes fixed on her, he wondered how long this would last. He quietly walked closer to her, brushing her hair gently off her face, even if he yearned for something more than this simple gesture. Her soft lips would be a faraway dream as the caress of a lover’s touch. The Conductor had been correct, but even so, he wouldn’t stop this, going as far as he could until the end.</p>
<p>Aria stirred, before moving in her sleep into a comfortable position. Not wanting to cause her to awaken, especially after how hard it was for her to fall into a pleasant slumber, he took off his coat and placed it on her. This seemed scandalous, the Conductor would throw him a fit if he saw it, but perhaps he could allow and enjoy this small moment of forbidden tenderness.</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SJILQWePbt4">[3]</a>
</p>
<p>“Your eyes are sparkling, dear guest.”</p>
<p>He lifted Aria’s chin gently to see her face more clearly, especially her lovely eyes.</p>
<p>Or so he would have done, but he had quieted down those impulses and thoughts as he merely stood in front of her.</p>
<p>“Are they…?”</p>
<p>“They did the moment you saw me, you must have been waiting anxiously for tonight’s story.”</p>
<p>“…I just can’t sleep.”</p>
<p>They were whispering by now, even if it was just the two of them in the hall and in the car, as her room was the only one occupied, the other guest having just left two stories ago.</p>
<p>“Hehe, that could be the case, <em>to be seeking for a comforting story</em>...”</p>
<p>She tucked her hair behind her ears, avoiding his eyes, perhaps as if he had seen through her and she had convinced herself he could read her heart.</p>
<p>“But I digress. This story is about an old fisherman who lived all of his life by the sea in this country to the far west. Where he lived, it was as if the sand under his feet blushed and the rocks had turned a pink hue as he walked. A similar tone to your cheeks right now… Oh, forgive me, I couldn’t help but wish to tease you just slightly.”</p>
<p>The young woman huffed, and looked away at him once more, but the color in her face stayed. That look of hers just made him want to tease her more, but he decided to be prudent, perhaps he would do so later.</p>
<p>“The old fisherman would work day by day by the sea, until one day he noticed the water had become transparent and the sky had been clear of clouds early in the morning. It was then that the quiet place began to fill with distant bells ringing, even if there was nothing but the man and the sea. As he looked around, he saw what appeared to be an enormous wave, at first seemingly like the ones that the fishermen all knew too well and feared immensely. But to his surprise, from the center of this curtain of water, an island emerged, and the sound of the bells and now organs were as clear as the water covering the beach. In the distance, he could make out what seemed to be a small gray and green cathedral, with a mossy glint that betrayed where it had come from, and the fisherman noticed that the music he could hear came from there. Such was his surprise that he had failed to notice the many voices of clergymen singing in a language he did not understand.</p>
<p>“But when he had realized there was an island that had risen from above the sea, the cathedral had sunken once more, as it was no longer daytime. From that day onward, he would look for the cathedral early in the morning, but to no avail, until one day, on another clear morning when the water had become transparent, he would see the mythical island emerge in front of him.”</p>
<p>Aria listened attentively, until he said, “That is all for today, I will tell you a new story tomorrow.” Her eyebrows furrowed though she didn’t voice her displeasure.</p>
<p>“Oh, you still wish for another story? I believe you are more interested in them than you would openly admit, hehe.”</p>
<p>“You talk a lot.”</p>
<p>“That is an unfair assessment, for I am sure that in spite of your shy demeanor, you are quite talkative inside your mind.”</p>
<p>“…You talk a lot.”</p>
<p>“Perhaps you would be more comfortable in the presence of the Conductor? I can arrange him to come here to keep you company.”</p>
<p>“I prefer you a thousand times.”</p>
<p>“Just a mere thousand times? Perhaps for every thousand days I tell you a story, the Conductor can share one with you.”</p>
<p>“You are terrible.”</p>
<p>“I am as terrible as you are peculiar, hiding your blatantly obvious interests from me, but still craving them, just as any highly curious guest.”</p>
<p>“I don’t like your new hobby of making fun of me.”</p>
<p>“On the contrary, I find our talks stimulating.”</p>
<p>“I was going to say something, but you’ll tease me again. Hmph.”</p>
<p>The Head Conductor chuckled as he smiled at her, eyes engraving the image of her flustered face as she tried to hide the blush from her cheeks.</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <a href="https://youtu.be/GAIZxaToV2A">[4]</a>
</p>
<p>Some time ago in a faraway land lived a young girl. The girl would hardly interact with strangers, for her shyness was so much that she wouldn’t be able to string two sentences together without fumbling them.  And so, she would spend her time at school by herself as she couldn’t manage to make a single friend.</p>
<p>However, she had found a language she wouldn’t fumble. Set in ivory and ebony pieces, the young girl began to play the piano, at first to imitate her mother, who masterfully played it to hear her laugh. With each time and song played, the young girl found she could express in tones what she couldn’t with words, and so she devoted more and more time to the piano.</p>
<p>As she grew, she started to imagine what lay beyond the years, and she decided she would play with her mother, in front of a chamber, as she kept practicing. But her dream was cut short, as through the phone she received the news of an accident where her parents had lost their lives.</p>
<p>Once more, the piano became the only way she could express her grief, as she was sent to live with a relative of her mother, someone who did not care much for her but only for the inheritance she had received. The young girl had paid no attention, because the money she got wouldn’t bring her lost loves back, and instead sought refuge in the piano.</p>
<p>Or perhaps, she was fully aware of her situation and decided to shield herself behind the notes.</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8fcy2X06VH4">[5]</a>
</p>
<p>“Are you still awake, dear guest?”</p>
<p>Aria turned away from the empty window to meet the Head Conductor’s affable, and dangerous, gaze. She was sitting in the dining car, at her usual table, watching the darkness go by.</p>
<p>“I can’t sleep.”</p>
<p>“This is troubling, no matter the luxuries and the facilities, it seems sleep keeps eluding you except for… You are making me flustered, for my stories to be your only lullaby… Should I be flattered? Or perhaps you find my stories boring and that is the only way for you to rest.”</p>
<p>“You know that isn’t the case,” she replied, but her voice was hardly any louder that a whisper to herself.</p>
<p>“At this rate you will have heard all of my stories,” he said, sitting on the empty spot in front of her.</p>
<p>“You’ll just keep making them up.”</p>
<p>The Head Conductor let out a hearty laugh, neither accepting or denying her words. “But enough of that, you must be eagerly waiting for another story. You see, there was one guest long before you arrived, he seemed to have trouble sleeping just like you. Except he would never reveal the reason for his insomnia and instead asked me if someone had entered his room.”</p>
<p>“While guests can naturally visit each other’s rooms, if a guest prefers to be left alone, of course no one will be allowed in their chambers. This guest had never expressed any wishes to keeping company at night, so his comment had troubled me. Neither the Conductor nor I had seen anyone come uninvited. After a personal request to the Conductor, we tightened security for this guest’s room, but it seemed for naught. Every following day, he would ask me if I had seen someone enter his room.”</p>
<p>“Of course, we did not and he would not delve further. How troublesome, indeed.” The Head Conductor laughed and smiled at Aria, who just shook her head as if she had seen this coming. “I had thought to myself that this mystery would end up unsolved, and this guest would never be able to sleep properly until one day, he finally came looking for me. His face had lost all color and the circles under his eyes were as dark as the landscape you fondly observe every night.’”</p>
<p>“’I have seen him again. I have heard him again,’ he confessed. ‘Every night when the moon glitters I can see that azure and golden flicker, as if to signal his arrival. He buzzes next to my ear and when I turn, he has disappeared. And no sooner had I  thought to myself that he has left, the sound of a fingernail against the wood or the curtains of my bed tells me I have spoken so soon.”</p>
<p>“’When I close my eyes, I can see him alight, jumping and rolling through my room, like a merciless fire which haunts me every night. And whenever I try to catch him, he disappears in a blue translucent light and I can only see his mocking face before he leaves no trace.’”</p>
<p>Aria frowned at him, not shy to hide her scowl. “I thought you’d tell me a story to sleep, not a story to keep me awake. Scarbo is no lullaby and you know it.”</p>
<p>“Haha, but I never said it was him, did I? Until this day, I have never seen our unexpected guest and soon after that confession, our guest arrived at his destination. In any case, you seemed to have lost all desire to sleep today and perhaps a story for you to keep you awake to greet the sun was more fitting. But I apologize, I have scared you instead. Allow me to offer you something warm to drink as I tell you a more comforting tale.”</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <a href="https://youtu.be/LR98AEAgnYQ">[6]</a>
</p>
<p>“Head Conductor,” the Conductor said, appearing as soon as Aria had gone inside her room. He reproached the Head Conductor with his gaze even though his tone was polite. “I can’t help but suspect you are becoming attached to that guest.”</p>
<p>“Hehe, my apologies for our secret midnight parties. I have not offered her your selected sweets.”</p>
<p>“Even if you jest, you must be aware what I am referring to. Though with your parties, you are making my work harder, I must add. However, you should remember the eventual fate of our guests, getting closer to her will only complicate things further. Not to mention, she has been asking questions… Or is it because of her questions you are interested in her?”</p>
<p>The Head Conductor gave an enigmatic smile as he calmly replied, “I should have expected such an acute observation from you, Conductor. You truly are fitting for your job.”</p>
<p>“Please cease your attempts at flattery if you will continue to prolong our guests’ stay. Consider my feelings for once.”</p>
<p>“If it will ease your worries, I will prevent her from going further than the dining room.”</p>
<p>The Conductor sighed wearily. “If only you had done that before, though part of me believes you are letting her do as she pleases just to satiate your own curiosity.”</p>
<p>The Head Conductor laughed heartily. “I did no such thing, though I admit I find her own doing fascinating. We have had our share of peculiar guests, you should be accustomed to their eccentricities.”</p>
<p>“You really are terrible, Head Conductor.”</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <a href="https://youtu.be/ZFvx32SjAtE">[7]</a>
</p>
<p>“If I study music professionally, perhaps I can be closer to you, in some way…”</p>
<p>The young girl, now a young woman, kept those thoughts in her heart and decided to pursue her dream in another shape, signing up for a preparation course to help her reach it. Things seemed to improve, as she found herself in the company of another girl and a boy. She played the piano, he, the violin.</p>
<p>The girl came from an affluent family, with charm and grace, and gathered the attention of everyone wherever she went. She was everything the young woman was not, and even if the young woman fell often in her shadow, she didn’t seem to mind, for she admired her friend’s brilliance.</p>
<p>The boy had another kind of light, always by the girl’s side, yet he at times showered the young woman with attention.</p>
<p>“You know, you are cute.”</p>
<p>As the young woman’s cheeks went red and she replied with a shy smile, she couldn’t help her heart from soon longing for him. Too shy to express her feelings, she could only watch him from afar, as they practiced and practiced, soon ready for the entrance exam.</p>
<p>And in between smiles and winks, the young woman began fostering the idea that she would reveal her feelings if she reached that place she was aiming for, while thinking that maybe he felt the same for her, especially when he invited her the day before the contest as he had an important confession to tell her.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p><b>[1] Nocturne in E Flat Major Op. 9 No. 2 - Chopin </b> Link: https://youtu.be/p29JUpsOSTE<br/>Chopin's most popular piece, he dedicated it to his student Maria Pleyel. He liked to dedicate his pieces to his students and he taught them his compositions, but he was extremely picky and strict when they played this piece. Apparently, Chopin aside, only Liszt could play this the way he wanted, but we recall that Liszt was a prodigy. However, Chopin was always frustrated that when Liszt played his music, like the Études Op. 10 he dedicated to him, Liszt made many arrangements and added his flair to them. He DID like them a lot and played them, so.<br/><b>[2] Moonlight Sonata Mov. 1 – Beethoven </b>Link: https://youtu.be/sbTVZMJ9Z2I<br/>One of Beethoven's most famous pieces, it's original name wasn't Moonlight Sonata, but "Sonata quasi una fantasia". The name from Moonlight Sonata came after Beethoven's death, when someone else, Ludwig Rellstab, made a comment that this movement specifically gave the imaginery of the moonlight shining over the Lake Lucerne. Of course, this became so popular, that further editions of this sheet have as title "Moonlight Sonata".<br/><b>[3] La cathédrale engloutie (The Sunken Cathedral) Préludes Book I No. X - Debussy </b>Link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SJILQWePbt4<br/>As Masato's story, the idea behind this melody comes from a cathedral located in the mythical island of Ys. There are several versions of why this island sunk in the sea, but they all deal around the princess Dahut willingly or not causing the gates which protected the island from the water open, and it caused Ys to sink. As for the piece itself, it's the UBER example of impressionism, even if Debussy heard that, he would get really angry. His titles and notes actually gave the pianist the exact idea and imaginery he was aiming for, so it's his own fault he got that label.<br/><b>[4] Passacaglia – Handel/Halvorsen </b>Link: https://youtu.be/GAIZxaToV2A<br/>The story for this one is wild, in that Handel first wrote this for the harpischord, then Halvorsen arrranged it for the violin and cello. While it seems "simple" enough in the piano, for stringed instruments, it demands a high technical skill for 2 players, as they are playing through more than 4 parts at the same time.<br/><b>[5] Gaspard de la nuit III. Scarbo - Ravel </b>Link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8fcy2X06VH4<br/>The final part of Gaspard the la nuit, Scarbo is actually the reason the entire set of pieces are hard, as he wanted to write a song more difficult than Islamey, from Balakirev. The entire melody reflects how Scarbo the Dwarf is jumping and scaring the poor man who is unlucky enough to have him visiting. Indeed, this thing was written by the devil himself. Also, I don't want to imagine what would happen if Ravel lived before Liszt and Liszt had his hands on this.<br/><b>[6] Etude No. 6 in A minor - Paganini/Liszt </b>Link: https://youtu.be/LR98AEAgnYQ<br/>When Liszt wasn't composing, he //really// liked to rearrange pieces from others, to add his flair of course (always annoying Chopin in the process), but he also liked to arrange pieces from other instruments to the piano. And so it was how his études  for the piano based on Paganini's works were created. Yes, the same violin Paganini, his brother in selling his soul to the devil because he was a virtuous monster. Everyone liked to flex, idk.<br/><b>[7] Liebeslied (Love’s Sorrow) – Kreisler (arr. Rachmaninoff) </b>Link: https://youtu.be/ZFvx32SjAtE<br/>Imagine writing a song, but somehow the title translation got messed up and it changes the entire feeling of the song. That is what happened here. The real title is Love's Sorrow, but it got fumbled as Liebeslied, or Love Song. So if one reads the mistaken title and listens to the song, they will naturally get very confused. Also, Rachmaninoff liked to arrange pieces too. Flex. Flex. Flex.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. IV.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thanks to polyphenols for beta-reading this fic!<br/>To enhance your experience, please listen to the suggested music indicated in the links as you read. Open them in a new tab with Ctrl +Left click. If possible, wear headphones to enjoy the most of it.<br/>Songs 6 and 9 continue until the next melody is indicated.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <a href="https://youtu.be/Xn84g05ptkk">[1]</a>
</p><p>“I have been wondering…” The Head Conductor began as he looked at Aria from the corner of his eye, the young woman sitting in her usual table, looking at the landscape before she had been spoken to. “There is something in this room which could help you sleep.”</p><p>He smiled as he saw her frowning, clearly confused by his words, but nonetheless rose from her seat to follow him. He walked past her along the diner car until he reached a large object in between the tables and the door to the kitchen. It was covered by a long white cloth, to prevent it from the unlikely dust in the Sleeper Express, a sign of it being in disuse.</p><p>“Unfortunately, there have not been as many instances in which we have come to make use of this, even though it is a waste to not use such an antique and precious object. Even though the Conductor will not be pleased, I believe we could make an exception with you. Hehe, I must admit, however, I have fancied doing this for a while now.”</p><p>With those words, the Head Conductor lifted the cloth to reveal a pristine upright black piano. He lifted the keyboard cover and gently took the velvet cloth over the keys.</p><p>His fingers caressed the delicate white keys, “I am quite fond of the piano. It is not often that I get to play it, as we do not want to disturb our guests, but I believe this one time will not cause any harm, hehe.”</p><p>No sooner than later, he had already adjusted the piano bench and turned to meet Aria’s frozen expression. Just as he had imagined, she wasn’t pleased in the slightest.</p><p>“I believe this instrument can soothe your soul,” he said, as he sat down and began playing a slow, gentle yet melancholic melody, a prelude.</p><p>“S-s…”</p><p>“You have been bewitched by it, haven’t you?”</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>
  <a href="https://youtu.be/BV7RkEL6oRc">[2]</a>
</p><p>Aria had felt the dread at the end of her throat as she walked closer. That faint figure under the cloth had been unmistakable to her, so much that she had avoided looking at it after seeing it once. But it was here again, to haunt her.</p><p>“S-s…”</p><p>“You have been bewitched by it, haven’t you?”</p><p>He kept playing, as chills went down her spine and the dread made it hard to breathe.</p><p>“That is why you keep coming here, don’t you?”</p><p>“S-stop…” Her voice cracked, as she was frantically shaking, and the room grew darker.</p><p>“You have longed for this, ha-”</p><p>
  <em>“Stop it!”</em>
</p><p>Hot tears flowing from her eyes, Aria pushed the Head Conductor’s hands away from the keys, her own stammering against the piano and she winced in pain. As if the keys were red iron, she shrieked away from him and the piano, running straight to the door leading to the fifth car, frantically trying to open the door even if her hands were shaking and stinging painfully.</p><p>The Head Conductor had composed himself over her outburst and he walked hurriedly towards her, worry over his face as she knocked on the door, shouting, “Let me out! Please!” even if her hands hurt so much she felt thousands of needles stabbing every single area, even if her throat hurt.</p><p>“Did you injure yourself?” he asked, trying to control his worry, but the moment Aria saw him close to her, she shrieked and fell on the ground, uncontrollably wailing and covering herself with her arms, as if to protect herself from him.</p><p>The Head Conductor opened the door, and Aria staggered to get up and away from the piano and the diner car, stumbling her way to her room. She almost slammed into the Conductor who was moving in their way, barely avoiding him with an agonizing scream.</p><p>She reached the door of her room, and shut herself inside, frantically forcing the lock on the door before falling to the ground a wailing mess. Tears wouldn’t stop falling from her eyes as she kept screaming and begging the Head Conductor to stop playing, over and over, as both the Head Conductor and the Conductor listened to her on the other side of the door.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>
  <a href="https://youtu.be/BO7-SalUMEc">[3]</a>
</p><p>The Head Conductor stared at the closed door, the never-ending cries were as painful and desperate as when Aria had first shut herself in her room. There was no concept of time in the Sleeper Express, and so he couldn’t say how long she had been like this. His attempts at reaching out to her had failed just like the very first one, and Aria wouldn’t open her door. The only times her room had fallen in silence were when she had fallen asleep, exhaustion from crying taking a toll over her body. But even so, those times seemed shorter compared to the anguish hours her wailing lasted.</p><p>“Head Conductor,” the Conductor said, to announce his presence, glancing briefly at the door. “There are no signs of the guest leaving her room, especially not when I was on guard, as you requested. Until now, none of the other guests have mentioned any complaints about this incident, but if you are unable to fulfill your job…”</p><p>The Head Conductor closed his eyes for a moment, he had already greatly neglected his duties as he kept watch on her, and the moment he was taking care of the needs of other guests, he had found himself thinking of her. The Conductor was right, he couldn’t let this go for long.</p><p>Even so, he couldn’t stop looking one more time at the closed door before he went back to attend the other guests.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>
  <a href="https://youtu.be/q9tcHoD6r0c">[4]</a>
</p><p>The door opened slowly, as a weary Aria looked around. Her eyes were swollen, red from all the tears she had shed, and her face made no attempts to hide her broken, pitiful state.</p><p>The hall was empty, even though this didn’t lift the weight on her chest.</p><p>Quietly, she reached the bathroom only to see herself an utter mess, a broken shell. She wasn’t surprised in the slightest, she just thought her exterior finally matched how she had felt. Even after she splashed water on her face, washing away her endless dried tears, the coolness didn’t bring any comfort.</p><p>She sighed, shoulders dropping, “Why am I even doing this?”, even if her reflection didn’t answer. She looked at her hands, several small scars were scattered, perhaps unnoticeable to others even now with her gloves off. They were useless, the feelings she tried to hide with them could no longer be ignored, the same as these tiny scars she would always carry.</p><p>She sighed again, making the restroom her place to suffer would show she had sank so low, so she left the place quietly to not attract any attention.</p><p>Except the Head Conductor was already waiting for her, next to the door of her room.</p><p>“Could I offer you some tea?”</p><p>She looked at him with glassy eyes, exhausted and hopeless. He would insist on checking on her, and so she figured she should just lay herself bare and then wither away. With an almost imperceptible nod, he took her to her usual table, the piano looking so far away, no longer hidden under the cloth as before. The Conductor kept an eye on her, as the Head Conductor had excused himself to go bring the tea, but she lay like a marionette with cut strings, staring at the ornate table. She wouldn’t try to leave, she couldn’t even escape.</p><p>Soon, the aroma of lavender filled the air, and she found herself vacantly staring at her reflection in her cup.</p><p>She was exhausted.</p><p>Duty over, the Conductor had left both alone, to her relief. One person was too many to learn of her ugliness. Long after the diner car’s door closed, she kept staring at her cup, and the Head Conductor didn’t utter a sound.</p><p>“Why haven’t you taken them away?” She whispered so faintly one could almost imagine her voice.</p><p>The Head Conductor didn’t reply, but his eyes almost pierced her soul.</p><p>“Why won’t you take them away? I am so tired…”</p><p>Their eyes met, she looked like a trampled flower, scattered petals as her dried tears until nothing was left.</p><p>“This train… it should have taken my memories long ago… But I…” Tears welled up again. “Even if I sleep or I am awake, they always come back, so please… Take them…”</p><p>The Head Conductor’s face was solemn, a glint of realization in his eyes, as he spoke.</p><p>“That is not possible. Anyone who realizes the true nature of this train will no longer be affected by it.”</p><p>“Is that why…?”</p><p>“Yes. Both the Conductor and I have been immune to its spell since we began working here. No, that is not accurate. The Conductor at one point lost his own memories as he wanders as an eternal outsider in this train, a guest turned employee.”</p><p>“Did you…?”</p><p>“I lost some of them, even though I still keep my name unlike him. The train can no longer prey on the souls of those aware, which makes them the perfect people to help it run.”</p><p>She took a sip of her tea, it had kept its warmth, to her surprise.</p><p>“How did you realize?” The Head Conductor asked softly.</p><p>“The moment I realized it wasn’t a dream… The moment I were discharged, I would have gone to the nearest lake to drown myself… But I am here…. I should have kept sleeping, even when I couldn’t…”</p><p>“You wanted to run away, that reminds you of myself. There was a reason why I arrived in this train, the same as you did, long ago, but that no longer matters.”</p><p>“You managed to continue… Yet I…”</p><p>“Will you tell me your story?”</p><p>Aria looked at the Head Conductor, with pained resignation, knowing this moment had arrived. She wondered if she could at least ask him to end her pathetic existence after she told him her tale.</p><p>“There was a story of a girl who lost her smile…”</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>
  <a href="https://youtu.be/0w5yI9ktJVo">[5]</a>
</p><p>
  <em>The darkness in my room reminds me of that day.</em>
</p><p>The park was the designated place, and the young woman waited for him, as the dimly lit light post barely let her see through the darkness of the night. She had waited for so long, so much that any other visitors had already left and the emptiness had already crept into her heart.</p><p>She felt scared of something she didn’t know.</p><p>
  <em>Or something I had suspected but refused to believe.</em>
</p><p>Deciding to go back home, she rushed through the empty roads of the park, leading to the nearest street, to where there were more lights. Except, as she saw the light post of the street coming closer into view, she noticed the sounds of more steps mirroring hers.</p><p>She felt ice slowly down her spine, refusing to turn back, and hurried her steps, but the sounds came closer to her. She knew, as horror took over her, and she ran out of the park, into the empty street, asking for help, except no one came.</p><p>She couldn’t run so long, before the shadows, two men clad in black, faces hidden except for their eyes, surrounded her. She tried to reason, except no words would leave her throat, and they threw her bag away as she had tried to offer it in exchange for her retreat.</p><p>The next thing she knew, she had been thrown to the floor, curling up to protect herself from the blows on her body, to no avail. One of them pinned her down, forcing her to extend her hands she had tried to hide from harm, as she saw the gaze of a second man looking down on her with the coldest eyes she had ever seen, before feeling excruciating, burning, pain as a foot stepped on her hands.</p><p>She let out an agonizing cry, begging them to stop, but the stomping on her hands didn’t stop, only becoming more vicious, as the only thing she could feel were her throbbing fingers crushed under that merciless heel. Tears filled her eyes, blurring everything as she struggled to break free without any success, as the man pinning her down pulled her hair and knelt on her body to make sure she would stay still. And if it hadn’t been painful enough, if the massive stomping hadn’t satisfied them, she heard the sound of breaking glass, and soon, she felt it shattering into her hands, hundreds of pieces digging into her skin, tearing her muscles as the assailant’s foot tread on her hands.</p><p>
  <em>It wasn’t long after that I let myself fall into the darkness.</em>
</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>
  <a href="https://youtu.be/hKkR4YFtyJk">[6]</a>
</p><p>
  <em>When I came to, the first thing I noticed was the dull pain in my body.</em>
</p><p>The young woman woke up in a hospital bed, almost surprised to find herself living. The nurses explained she was found in the morning and brought here, undergoing surgery to save her hands.</p><p>
  <em>It wasn’t only my hands, but my heart ached.</em>
</p><p>“It was a miracle you didn’t lose any fingers, but the damage to your nerves is irreparable. Even though the surgery should allow your right hand to heal, the damage sustained on your left was too severe. We tried everything at our disposal, but your left hand will surely lose all fine motor function. As for your right hand, with proper rehabilitation, it can regain functionally, but it will not recover completely.”</p><p>When the police arrived to question her over the incident, the young woman was confused, fumbling her answers as her words were marred with pain and despair. It wasn’t only that she had missed the entrance contest. It went further than that, realizing she had lost her ability to play the piano.</p><p>
  <em>I couldn’t tell them I recognized one of the attackers, when I briefly met his eyes as he stepped on my hand. If I did so, I would have to accept that everything I knew was a lie, and I had mistaken the crumbles of affection for an illusion.</em>
</p><p>There were rumors of only one place available for a pianist. <em>It was her or me.</em> In such a competitive world, the sheltered young woman had failed to realize skill was a double-edged sword. <em>I was a fool for opening myself to them, but I yearned for...</em> When one showed their best, it would put a mark on their head. <em>I had blinded myself to the truth, thinking he could feel something for me, when he had always devoted himself to her. </em>And anyone willing to take the risk would surely get rid of the threat they unknowingly were.</p><p>
  <em>I can no longer play the piano.</em>
</p><p>The thought of the piano would cause her unfathomable despair, so much that it began to reflect in her irregular and slow recovery. No longer after, she was placed on special watch, to the point of immobilizing her for the danger she now was to her own life.</p><p>
  <em>In the end, I have no one but myself to blame.</em>
</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>“Do you wish for death?”</p><p>“You are too smart…” She looked at her hands, as if the injuries were still fresh.</p><p>“Every night I wasn’t able to sleep, I would be haunted by nightmares every time I closed my eyes. It reached a point where I needed to take medicine for my body to rest, but the nightmares didn’t stop. Though being awake didn’t bring me any relief either. I would recall constantly everything, so much that I wanted someone to take me away. But that didn’t happen, so I resolved to quiet myself until I was discharged and I would quietly disappear, so that no one found me.”</p><p>“Do you not wish for revenge, for the injuries your body and soul received unfairly and cruelly, the dreams you lost and the heart which was crushed?”</p><p>“It won’t let me play again…”</p><p>“Even though the scars linger deeply in your heart?”</p><p>“…When I was in the hospital, I discarded my feelings for him after endless nights of pain. But the pain still remains… That is why I want to disappear, but you aren’t letting me… You’re not taking away my memories, not even the happy ones that remind me of everything I can no longer have.”</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>
  <a href="https://youtu.be/MBOa-2b4uQQ">[7]</a>
</p><p>The Head Conductor rose from his seat, as he excused himself, “I will do something that perhaps is inappropriate, but I beg you to bear with me…” and he sat next to Aria, so close there was little space between them.</p><p>”For now, please let me give you something, something you wish from the bottom of your heart, your most hidden desire.” With a careful hand on her chin, he lifted her face up, making her meet his eyes. The turmoil in her soul was bewitching, as beautiful as it was heart-wrenching to see her pained like this. The abandon in her sight, the weariness of a traveler who has long sought for a place for comfort and rest, to no avail.</p><p>And without a word, he leaned until their faces were so close that his lips met hers, pulling her closer, feeling her warmth and her softness.</p><p>He expected her to push him away, just as she had kept pushing anything that reminded her of her past, her desires, her love for the piano and her will to live. But she did not.</p><p>Staying still, eyes closed as in a prayer, she whispered, “Please hold me.”</p><p>And so the Head Conductor embraced her, pulling her gently, treating her so delicately, lips locked between hers, feeling her warmth.</p><p>“Will you hurt me…?” She dared to ask, after breaking the kiss, still feeling the fire of his lips on hers.</p><p>“That is an unfair question.” He took one of her locks in his hand, the other gently cupping her face. His gaze was fixed on hers, baring his soul to her as she had done to him. “I would never dream of hurting you, but no one can assure us it will never happen. Mistakes, random events, perhaps even the gods themselves, who can guarantee they will not try to be the cause of your tears again? But I swear I will protect you, I will protect your smile.”</p><p>Her lips trembled, her eyes were brimming with tears and soon they traveled down her cheeks. Even so she didn’t stop looking at him as she took his vow, as she brought his hands to her lips and kissed them, sealing their feelings in that gesture. Their bodies soon melted into one another, him holding her in his arms as she quietly wept her heart out, feeling secure for the first time on the chest of her beloved.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>
  <a href="https://youtu.be/CS58YQaVIaA">[8]</a>
</p><p>The Head Conductor’s hands glided across the piano, deft fingers carefully giving birth to the nostalgic sound which filled the air. Sitting next to him, with her back towards the piano, sat Aria.</p><p>
  <em>Do you have any regrets?</em>
</p><p>There was no answer.</p><p>“Do you like the piano?”</p><p>“Yes. I am quite fond of it. Music is another pastime of mine, you see. There is something in it which transcends time, even in a place which has forsaken it.”</p><p>Aria closed her eyes.</p><p>“This is as far as I can go…”</p><p>“Is that so?</p><p>She didn’t answer.</p><p>“Are you fine with this? To be a simple onlooker, swayed by the memories in your dreams?”</p><p>“…I can’t bear to look at it.”</p><p>“Yet you are still here. Keeping your gaze away from that which brought you solace and became the cause of incredible pain.”</p><p>“You won’t take it away from me, no matter how much I want it.”</p><p>“Do you truly mean that? Do you wish to renounce to the memories, the ethereal proof of your existence, your feelings, as you fade away in your sleep?”</p><p>Aria’s lips parted a couple of times, without any reply, and her lips drew in a long line which began to tremble seconds after. She leaned instead against the Head Conductor’s arm and lowered her head.</p><p>“That is no longer possible for you, having realized the true nature of this train. And so your memories can continue to haunt you. However… perhaps you can find solace in this story of a guest who came to this train long before you.”</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>
  <a href="https://youtu.be/xDWG9SrB4io">[9]</a>
</p><p>I had expected her to get up and leave, like fading star in the horizon. But instead, she chose to relieve her pain, as the music engulfed the room. The place she leaned her head against is now wet. I can only imagine your face, trying to appear emotionless as you were quietly drowning in despair.</p><p>You truly love the piano, don’t you, Aria?</p><p>In that case, I will play this song for you.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>
  <em>It was at that point, I thought my life was over.</em>
</p><p>The Head Conductor’s hands glided on the pristine piano keys, so tender like the touch of a lover. She recognized the song, as she sat next to him, her eyes fixed on his elegant movements before brimming with tears.</p><p>
  <em>The small, feeble existence I had crafted for myself.</em>
</p><p>Of course she would know the song, resounding in her heart, quietly pounding even though it ached.</p><p>
  <em>Losing the dexterity of my right hand, my left one beyond hope of recovery.</em>
</p><p>If he noticed her covering her mouth to muffle her sobs, unable to stop looking at him playing the piano, he didn’t show it, continuing to play from the bottom of his heart.</p><p>
  <em>I had closed myself to the world. And I could no longer have mine.</em>
</p><p>“Did you know the most basic form of music?”</p><p>
  <em>At that point, I wondered if I had truly lived.</em>
</p><p>“Yes, the melody of a single voice.”</p><p>She looked up to meet his gaze, in between tears, as he looked back at her, with a soft smile on his face.</p><p>“In the cacophony of sounds, it is the most elemental, yet beautiful composition one can make. If it comes from your heart, it is the materialization of your feelings, of the story of your life.”</p><p>“You find it beautiful, don’t you? Hehe, of course you would. After all, you love stories. The stories one can make with one’s voice or the ones one can turn into music. Even if you felt apart from the piano, you never stopped searching for it.”</p><p>“You thought you could no longer play, with an injured hand which has banned you from the perfect story you wanted to achieve. However…”</p><p>“Just because you no longer can reach perfection… No, perfection is something beyond humans, but, wouldn’t you believe that itself is wondrous? I believe I told you, all human experiences shine to me, and yours is the most brilliant.”</p><p>“After all, there is only one melody only you can create. And of course, I will be willing to listen to it.”</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>
  <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gus4dnQuiGk">[10]</a>
</p><p>Aria took a deep breath, her trembling right hand hovering on the white keys.</p><p>The pain and the fear, her doubts, she had to cast them away as she pressed the two black keys.</p><p>She exhaled.</p><p>For a brief period, her right hand would become her left for the first triplets, until she would have to become the main voice. Her left hand rested on her lap, so injured it wouldn’t be able to keep up with the notes, even if she had slowed her speed in the first place.</p><p>It would be alright if she could play it with one hand, it was already an imperfect song.</p><p>The first set of notes of the main voice resounded alone, without the backing of the triplets, as she smiled bitterly, but this was as much as she could do…</p><p>As she went into the second set, she imagined hearing the triplets, thinking it was a product of the ghostly hundreds of hours she had spent trying to master the song, until she saw the long nimble fingers of the Head Conductor gliding on the piano, matching her piece.</p><p>He had already made himself comfortable sitting next to her, smiling at her shock that caused her to halt until he whispered, “It is rude to leave a melody unfinished, <em>Aria</em>.”</p><p>He took her injured hand in his right hand and gently squeezed her, not stopping once playing his part of the song, repeating the same notes over and over, even if he should have advanced, until she played again.</p><p>With a watery gaze, she turned at him one last time before focusing on the piano, finally continuing as if it had been a mere stop from the long last time she played.</p><p>The notes from the piano flowed gently, like quiet drops against the window. Aria’s heart pounded in her chest, feeling the warmth of the Head Conductor’s hands as she led him through the piece.</p><p>The teasing of the slow-tempo middle, like his mysterious enchanting smile at her, her heartbeat rising as they reached the fast-paced <em>coda</em>. The gentle ending like a knight’s kiss.</p><p>Even if her movements were at times wonky, a sign of her injuries, to her, it was the most beautiful performance of it that she had ever heard, of the hidden fantasy of her soul.</p><p>And just like a fading dream, it was over.</p><p>Her hand rested on the piano keys, still dazed for a moment, until she noticed her left hand was still held by him, a sign it was neither a nightmare nor a dream. She turned to look at him, not realizing the tears freely flowing down her cheeks nor her brightest, softest smile. The Head Conductor was stunned at the sight of her, before he gently wiped her tears with his free hand.</p><p>She opened her mouth to thank him, but words died in her throat, letting out instead a wail, and without any warning, she threw herself into his chest, in between sobs, she messily thanked him for giving her dreams back to her.</p><p>The Head Conductor chuckled as he held her close, looking at her with the softest loving gaze, letting them bask in the melody they had achieved.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p><b>[1] Prelude in E Minor Op. 28 No. 4 – Chopin </b>Link: https://youtu.be/Xn84g05ptkk<br/>Another famous composition of Chopin, he actually requested it to be played in his funeral, along Mozart's Requiem. The song actually had a title, but the scores which had it were lost. However, from testimony from George Sand's daughter, it is thought to be "Quelles larmes au fond du cloître humide?" which is translated into "What tears (are shed) from the depths of the damp monastery?".<br/><b>[2] Moonlight Sonata 3rd Movement - Beethoven </b>Link: https://youtu.be/BV7RkEL6oRc<br/>The third movement of the Moonlight Sonata, the entire piece is thought to be romantic. However, it was written during the period Beethoven's hearing was severely declining. Hence one can feel his stormy feelings strongest in this movement.<br/><b>[3] Moment Musicaux No. 4 - Rachmaninoff </b>Link: https://youtu.be/BO7-SalUMEc<br/>During the time Rachmaninoff decided to stop composing, he went on a train trip but he was robbed. He lost a lot of money, so he wrote this to recover his finances. It takes from Chopin's Preludes, and Chopin's Revolutionary Étude.<br/><b>[4] Pavane pour une infant défunte – Ravel </b>Link: https://youtu.be/q9tcHoD6r0c<br/>Ravel was another musician thought to be a pillar of impressionism, like Debussy, and he also hated the label. However, he thought Debussy was indeed the impressionist.  F. The melody he wrote is meant to reminisce a princess dancing slowly in court, long ago. The music is at odds with his intent, so modern audiences ignore his intended meaning.<br/><b>[5] Pictures at an Exhibition: Baba Yaga - Mussorgsky </b>Link: https://youtu.be/0w5yI9ktJVo<br/>Mussorgsky was one of the big 5 in Russia, and Puctures at an Exhibition is a collection of pieces he wrote. This specific piece refers to Baba Yaga, a common figure in Slavic folklore. Baba Yaga is a witch who kidnaps and eats children, and she lives in a hut with chicken legs. She sometimes appears as a source of knowledge or help in myths, but she's usually no good news.<br/><b>[6] Tempest Sonata No. 17 3rd Mov. – Beethoven </b>Link: https://youtu.be/hKkR4YFtyJk<br/>This sonata was written during one Beethoven's hardest times as he was realizing that his deafness was becoming severe and that he would end up deaf. According to letters to his family, it weighed heavily on him that he would eventually have to ask others to talk loud because he, //a composer//, couldn't hear. He even considered committing suicide because of his despair. While the title, "Tempest" comes from him allegedly refering to a play by Shakespeare, considering the emotion behind the three movements, the new title isn't unfitting. After this, he decided to go on and kept on composing until his death.<br/><b>[7] Liebestraum No. 3 – Liszt </b>Link: https://youtu.be/MBOa-2b4uQQ<br/>The third of Liszt's Love Dream pieces. It is based on the poem "Love as long as you can" by Ferdinand Freiligrath, about mature unconditional love. Liszt is one of Masato's favorite composers and this song is clearly special for him.<br/><b>[8] Consolation No. 3 - Liszt </b>Link: https://youtu.be/CS58YQaVIaA<br/>This song was composed a year after Chopin's death and it is considered a tribute to his friend, as it is similar to Chopin's Nocturne Op. 27 No. 2. It clearly has the influence from his friend, with the subtlety and emotion he often envied in Chopin's works.<br/><b>[9] Air - Bach </b>Link: https://youtu.be/xDWG9SrB4io<br/>An air is a composition by instruments which gives the impression of being sung by voice. It's variant used in opera and oratorio is Aria.<br/><b>[10] Fantaisie Impromptu Op. 66 - Chopin </b>Link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gus4dnQuiGk<br/>Chopin's tribute and inspiration from Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata 3rd movement. As genius as this melody was, Chopin hated it and wanted it to be burned upon his death, but like his Waltz Op. 69 No. 2 his friend thought it was too good to burn. It is thought he hated it because he feared people comparing it to Moonlight Sonata. Also if you want something to burn, do it yourself, I guess.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. V.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thanks to polyphenols for beta-reading this fic!<br/>To enhance your experience, please listen to the suggested music indicated in the links as you read. Open them in a new tab with Ctrl +Left click. If possible, wear headphones to enjoy the most of it.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <a href="https://youtu.be/-W-2tXkSwqg">[1]</a>
</p>
<p>“Welcome to our sleeper limited express train. We are delighted you have chosen to ride with us,” the Head Conductor greeted. “Should you find yourself in the need of music to entertain you, we have the company of a wonderful pianist as well.”</p>
<p>Aria came behind the Head Conductor, puffing her pinkish cheeks, as she mumbled, “Please, you are exaggerating. I am just arranging some piano pieces, that is all.”</p>
<p>“Hehe, I hardly believe that is true. After all, I rather enjoy myself when I listen to you play and I have high standards, you see.”</p>
<p>The smirk directed at Aria made the young woman blush, and turn away with a coy smile on her face.</p>
<p>“I shall go to my room. If I play often, the Conductor will scold me again.”</p>
<p>The two were interrupted by the Conductor, who signaled his appearance with a discrete cough. “My, my, please refrain from your lovers’ banter in front of the guests. Head Conductor, you are always making my work harder with those bad habits of yours.”</p>
<p>“My apologies, hehe,” the Head Conductor replied with a small bow to the confused guest.</p>
<p>“Please, allow me to take you from here,” the Conductor interrupted, placing himself between the guest and the Head Conductor. “It seems our Head Conductor needs to get some rest, though rest assured that he will make it up to us as soon as he is finished with his sudden business.” The Conductor shot a half-icy knowing glare, expecting the sweetest of desserts as a way to apologize.</p>
<p>Chuckling, the Head Conductor excused himself with another bow, and he soon joined hands with Aria as they walked towards her room.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p><b>[1] Impromptu Op. 90 No. 2 in E-flat Major – Schubert </b>Link: https://youtu.be/-W-2tXkSwqg<br/>One of Schubert's most iconic pieces, and one of the compositions of the 19th Century. As mentioned before, Schubert was a genius who unfortunately died young.  However, he was one of the touchbearers at Beethoven's funeral and after his death, a year after, he was buried close to his idol.</p>
<p>And with this, our journey intro dreamland comes to an end.<br/>Thank you for reading!</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you for reading!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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